You can write, but we don’t jive, enjoy the rest of your life

When you write a post for a company and they don’t like it, but you still kind of do. ?

A media company approached me recently to submit a sample article for a Milliennial (22 to 37) audience. They provided the event and I was told to capture the essence of it. I missed the mark (they said “good, but not for Millennials”). Oh well, it was a silly bit of fun to write. This is the piece:

I wanna rock ‘n’ roll all night, and run part of every day — A misheard lyrics guide to the Rock ‘n’ Roll marathon

You’re fun, you keep active and you love hanging with a big crowd. Oh, and you like to party. You, you like to party. If any of this sounds like you, you might want to grab a few of your mates and register for the Rock ‘n’ Roll Oasis. A day where the music is loud, the crowds are louder and the chance for mishearing lyrics is off the proverbial hook. So, just slip off the Aerosmith scarves, Marv, register a team, Jean, hop on the course, Morris, and let yourself run free, Amelie. Here are five ways to leave your love, sweat and cheers at the Oasis.

Excuse me while I pass this guy

We’re takin’ it to the streets! Unlike other marathons, this race is all about making sure everyone can participate and have fun. From a 1K (let’s call that the Come On Eileen) to a 10K (Ten by Pearl Jam, maybe?) to a full-length marathon (hello, Rolling Stones!), there is a distance with your name tattooed all over it.

Smells like team spirit

Yes, you shook me. You shook me all race long. That’s how you’ll feel when you’re running your race and that crowd starts to cheer you on. This isn’t your regular line of marathon boosters giving you a not-so-into-it clap on the sidelines. No, you are a marathon rock god and your fans, no, groupies, are going to cheer you on like you’ve just finished your third encore. If lighters were still a thing, they’d be lifted and waved like you’re at a Nirvana concert circa 1992.

There’s a live band on your right

The bands are my friends, they’re blowing in the wind. The best part about this fun run are the local bands dotted along the course blowing verses at you while you run, run like the wind. Think of it as your workout playlist, but better.

Rock the cash bar

Give me a free beer, why don cha babe. After you run the race you’ll wanna keep hanging out with your crew. You’ll get that first cold one for FREE, then you’re free to sit back, take a long, frosty sip and listen to Hedley drop the beat and free your soul. Just don’t lose control. La la la la, oh oh oh. No, seriously, don’t lose control, please drink responsibly. Don’t be like a drummer from a 70’s rock band.

Money for nothing and some swag for free

Hold me closer, Tony Danza, because along with that complimentary beer, you also get an STM card, an official tee and a finisher’s medal. And from now until Friday, September 11, receive $xx off when you use SAMPLE.

So, if you’re ready to rock ‘n’ race, register today. The Oasis runs Saturday, September 20. We hope you have the time of your life.

Misheard lyrics guide to rock n roll marathon

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